O VER the years, Hexham Abbey’s Light up a Life services, organised by Tynedale Hospice at Home, have become a firm fixture on the Christmas calendar.

They offer people an important opportunity to remember loved ones who have died, at the same time as raising funds for a very worthwhile cause.

Indeed the Abbey event has become so successful that there are now services in Prudhoe and Ponteland as well.

Kay and Jeffrey Gilhespy, of Allendale, are just one couple who will be at Saturday afternoon’s Abbey service, grateful for the opportunity of giving something back to the hospice this Christmas time.

For they lost their baby, Ava-Violet, at only 16 days old on Mother’s Day last year. She had been born with an extremely rare genetic condition called Trisomy 13, which affected her heart.

Doctors had told the couple that their baby’s diagnosis meant she may die during or soon after birth, but they were determined to give her a chance at life.

So Kay fought to get a team of doctors in place to help, including cardiologists and a neonatal team who would be on hand as she came into the world.

However, it was during a routine scan at 35 weeks that Kay found out she was in silent labour and that Ava’s heart wasn’t coping.

Jeffrey, a submariner, was working away in Scotland and so Kay gave birth to 4lb 10oz Ava-Violet with her sister-in-law by her side.

She was transferred from the RVI to the Freeman Hospital’s cardiac unit, where she had daily scans to assess her heart, and after a fortnight the couple were permitted to take her home.

The couple will always cherish the two days Ava-Violet spent in the bosom of her family, surrounded by her brothers and sisters, Millie, then seven, Oliver, four and Alexander, two.

But sadly, on the evening of March 14, the tiny infant suffered another major cardiac shock and despite being rushed to hospital, Ava died early the next morning on Mothering Sunday, 2015.

Kay recalls: “She was worth the fight; she deserved a chance. Now, I miss her with every fibre of my being.”

Keen to get support for their children during the months ahead, the couple turned to Tynedale Hospice at Home’s family support service where Kay and Jeffrey received one-to-one support.

The children attended family sessions and Rainbow Days where they were able to talk about how they were feeling and were introduced to other children who had lost a parent or sibling.

Kay says: “Tynedale Hospice provided a lifeline. It’s hard enough coping with Ava’s death as an adult, but Val Jewitt and Emma Andrews (both family practitioners with the service) helped us all to get through it.”

Light up a Life invites people, like the Gilhespys, to remember a loved one who has died by making a donation in their memory. In return, you will receive a card with your loved one’s name(s) inside and a memory star to write your own message on. This can be brought to one of the Light up a Life services or used to hang on your own Christmas tree at home.

Fund-raising manager for Tynedale Hospice at Home Laura Elliott says: “Christmas can be a particularly difficult time for people who have lost someone they love and Light up a Life is all about providing the opportunity for people to remember that special person or people.”

The services are open to everyone, of all faiths, whether they have experienced the services of Tynedale Hospice at Home or not and people do not have to have made a donation to attend.

This year’s services:

l Hexham Abbey, Saturday, December 3 at 4pm.

l St Mary’s Church, Ponteland, Sunday, December 4, at 4pm.

l Prudhoe Methodist Church, Saturday, December 10, at 4pm.

Laura adds: “The Light up a Life services are really special. They provide an opportunity to bring the community together and for people to remember their loved ones in quiet reflection. The short services include carol singing and a chance to light a candle for your loved one before a tree of lights is lit.”

To dedicate a light in memory of someone special, call (01434) 606 444 or email www.tynedalehospice.com